Category: Mr Damane

Ah, I see. I do wish that you had made that fact plain a bit earlier in the proceedings. So if I can get the money to you by tomorrow morning then the deal goes ahead, if not then I have a ticket to Johannesburg which isn’t really of any use to me?

Perhaps I should finally explain my apparent reluctance to use a phone. Some years ago, before I went into the fitness training business, I was involved in what you might call the shady side of the jewellery business. One day I was a little too close to the safe when we blew the doors off, I lost both ears and my hearing has been seriously impaired ever since, making a conversation on the phone entirely impractical. There, I’ve admitted it.

The Western Union office is open untill 6 this evening, I shall go and transfer the money now. The we will see who is serious Mr. Nathan.

Regards

B. Nodelay

To: b.nodelay@hotmail.co.uk
Date: Wed, 15 Dec 2010 16:44:25 +0000
Subject: RE: Change of plan
From: edward@nathanassociates.com

Attention: B.Nodelay

You don’t seem to get it,if the non-resident account is not opened by tomorrow the it will not be possible to remit the fund out of the country this year,it will have to wait until the first week of next year by which time anything can happen,so you see that if you do not send the account fee tomorrow before arriving here then it is pointless because you will wait until next year which your partner cannot afford waiting,so if you do not send the account fee tomorrow morning you can as well forget about the remittance because if your partner have to suceed he has to get the account being processed from tomorrow.
So if you are serious which I know you are not then send the fee tomorrow so that the account will be ready upon your arrival,don’t you have a phone number?

Yours Sincerely,

Edward Nathan Esq

Dear Joseph

I have had 2 rather distressing emails from Mr. Nathan. The best I can assume is that he has been drinking, at worst he is attempting to cut me from this deal and replace me with one of his cohorts.
I have told him that we will accept none of his nonsense, indeed I feel we should replace him. Can you find another lawyer before Friday? No need to collect me from the airport if it will cause you any inconvenience, I’m quite happy to get a taxi, just let me know where to meet you.

Kind Regards

Brooke.

Mr Nathan

There is no need for that tone of voice. I have TWICE sent you a scan of my passport which you claim to be “unable to download”.  I have laid out the best part of a thousand pounds on an airline ticket, partly for some sunshine but partly, I might add, down to your inability to simply OPEN AN ATTACHMENT! The simplest solution seemed to be for me to place the money and my passport directly into your hands.

My partner appears to hold you in high regard Mr. Nathan, but I am beginning to have deep misgivings about employing you, indeed as we say in these parts I very much doubt that you could be trusted with a used plate of whelks. I would not be at all surprised to find that you had one of your cohorts lined up ready to replace me as Mr. Damanes partner. Well, we shall see about  that, I shall discuss the matter with Mr. Damane.

Yours.

B. Nodelay.

To: b.nodelay@hotmail.co.uk
Date: Wed, 15 Dec 2010 15:42:16 +0000
Subject: RE: Change of plan
From: edward@nathanassociates.com

Attention:  B.Nodelay

No offence taken, and collecting you should not be beneath him what am saying is that,you cannot even provide an form of identity document or a phone number and expect me to believe you are capable to handle this remittance,I think you are wasting your partner’s time and will inform as such.
Yours Sincerely,
Edward Nathan Esq.

Dear Mr. Nathan,

What are you talking about? I certainly didn’t mean to cause any offence by suggesting that Mr. Damane might be able to collect me from the airport. I have to admit that I know little of Mr. Damane’s background, is collecting a business partner from the airport somehow beneath him? I’m beginning to see that I may have committed a terrible faux-pas. Oh well, the ticket is bought, I shall simply have to get a taxi to your office and somehow convince Joseph that I really meant no offence.

Kind Regards

Mr. B.Nodelay

To: b.nodelay@hotmail.co.uk
Date: Wed, 15 Dec 2010 15:05:07 +0000
Subject: Re: Change of plan
From: edward@nathanassociates.com

Attention: B Nodelay,
I can see that you are not a serious person,wasting your partner’s valuable time,whenever you arrive call me.
Yours Sincerely,
Edward Nathan Esq.

Dear Joseph,

I have some exciting news! I suddenly realised that I may as well just book a flight to South Africa and conduct this business in person. I am hoping that as soon as that side of things is out of the way then you may be able to spare a few days to show me around your wonderful country.

My flight is the BA0055 departing London Heathrow 17:50 Thursday 16th December, arriving Johannesburg Terminal A 06:45 Friday 17th December. I trust that you will either be able to meet me off the plane in person or send a car for me. I have told Mr Nathan that I will be at his offices at around 9PM in order to pay the fees and hand over my identity documents.

I do so look forward to finally meeting my partner!

Kind Regards,

Brooke.

Dear Mr. Nathan

I was halfway to the Western Union office, struggling against a chilly North Westerly wind when I had a sudden thought. I have nothing to keep me here in England, in winter, except perhaps a long jail sentence. I’ve always rather fancied the idea of getting away to a sunnier climate and am pleased to say that I have secured the last economy class seat on flight BA055, arriving Johannesburg 06:45 local time on the 17th December.

I shall ask my partner to collect me from the airport and would hope to arrive at your offices by about 9 on Friday morning.

I look forward to meeting you in person!

Kind Regards

Mr. B. Nodelay.

To: b.nodelay@hotmail.co.uk
Date: Wed, 15 Dec 2010 12:54:42 +0000
Subject: RE: REMITTANCE PROCEDURE
From: edward@nathanassociates.com

Attention: Brooke Nodelay,

Am still waiting for you to send the western union slip/reference so that I can commence with the fund remittance.

Yours Sincerely,

Edward Nathan Esq.