Category: Mrs Mohds

Dear Mrs Mohd’s

Please forgive me, I have behaved in a most disgraceful fashion. As you will recall I planned to send the clearance money to Mr Lord Porch first thing this afternoon, after this morning’s whisky tasting.
Well, it all began to go a bit wrong after the third or fourth glass of cask strength Port Charlotte PC11. Things are a bit of a blur after that and by the time I got to the Post Office Mr McDonald was closing up. I did bang on the door and ask if I was too late to send a money gram but Mr McDonald just told me to go away and called me a “drunken old fool”.

I shall have an early night and go to the Post Office first thing tomorrow morning. Once again, I do apologise for this uncharacteristic behaviour.
I will mail you as soon as I have transferred the money tomorrow.

Kind Regards,

Ethel

From: “Zahrah Mohd’s”
Date: Tue, December 2, 2014 6:41 pm
To: trellis

Dear Ethel,

I did not receive any information from you today on the perception of the arrangement with the custom, i hope the arrangement went smoothly, please confirm to me.
I wait for your responds.

Mrs. Zahrah Mohd’s.

Subject: RE: I have the money!
From: “Zahrah Mohd’s”
Date: Tue, December 2, 2014 6:18 am
To: trellis

Dear Ethel,

I really appreciate your effort, please kindly contact Mr. Lord Porch to confirm how to transfer the money for him to receive it and conclude the arrangement with the custom to retrieve the box and deliver it to you as agreed without delay.

Thank you so kindly for your effort.
Mrs. Zahrah Mohd’s.

Subject: Re: CUSTOM CLEARANCE AND TAX PAYMENT
From: “Dipl. LORD PORCH”
To: trellis

Ok, if you are transfering the money kindly follow the instruction below to make the transfer through Money Gram and the send the payment slip through email attachment to my inbox because the custom has contacted me today regards to this clearance payment of your box.
You are to send the money via MONEY GRAM directly to my name as given below and after the payment, email the payment details to me for immediate pick up to pay the clearance charges to the custom before booking my departure ticket to Scotland to deliver the box to you.
MONEY GRAM TRANSFER INFORMATION BELOW,
Receivers Name: Lord Porch
Location: 120, Belmont Road Liverpool.
Country: United Kingdom
Amount: 2,265.00 pounds sterling
Immediately the fee is paid, notify me by sending the MONEY GRAM reference informations via email attachment.
You are required to go to any bank close to you now in your country and make the transfer via MONEY GRAM through the bank immediately and forward the payment information through email to me so i can make the payment to the custom and book my flight ticket to Scotland and get you informed my flight schedule to enable you pick me up at your airport in Scotland.
You can call me direct on my telephone number +447924339603 as soon as the payment is done.
Please do forward a scan copy of your passport or identity card for easy
identification.

Yours faithfully,
Diplomat,
Mr. Lord Porch.
London UK.

Dear Mrs Mohd’s,

I have just returned from Bowmore with £3000. The interest rate is an extortionate 50% for the 4 week period over which I have borrowed the money and there is also a £250 service charge. However all will be well when your box arrives. Mr Thomson is a hard but fair man, he emphasised that I had nothing at all to worry about as long as I was able to repay all I owe him within 4 weeks.
The Post office in Port Charlotte is closed on Tuesday mornings for cleaning so I will go along first thing tomorrow afternoon to transfer the money to Mr Porch.
This has all worked out rather well, it means I will be able to attend the whisky tasting at the Bruichladdich distillery tomorrow morning after all. They are releasing their latest heavily peated offering, made with locally grown barley and by tradition the villagers of Port Charlotte are the first to sample it. It would have been a shame to miss it.
I will inform you and Mr Lord Porch as soon as the deed is done.

Kind Regards,

Ethel

Dear Mrs Mohd’s

There is no need for an attorney, you have an honest face. Please forgive me for doubting you. I shall go to see Mr Thomson this evening.

Kind Regards,

Ethel

Dear Mrs Ethel Trellis,

Through our brief interaction by e-mail, I have learned you are a person of great character and kind, I am glad that I found you to help me. Likewise, I feel very comfortable with you and you can be absolutely sure that your goodness will be returned unfailingly and joyously. Like i said in the beginning of this transaction, i have all concrete evidence to confirm to you that this transaction is 100% legal with all legal documents that will identify the source of the money and to confirm to you as the receiver and owner of the cash that you have legal back up from me to your country.
It is obvious that we have not met before, we do not know each other. I understand your carefulness. Honestly, if I am in your shoes I will feel the same way, this is why i am forwarding to you my identity card so that you will confirm that you are dealing with the right person regards to this transaction to avoid entertaining fears for this payment, like i told you, i will strictly maintain our agreement to the later.

I still believe that you can assist me in that aspect but i am only getting signal from your heart to me that you are only afraid of spending such money because fears of scam, if this is your insinuation, we can make an agreement with an attorney regards to this transaction to confide in legal documents.
Please contact the diplomatic agent in London to finalize the clearance payment because the box is staying more than expected at the airport.

Thank you,
Mrs. Zahrah Mohd’s.

Dear Mrs Mohd’s,

Please try not to worry, I’m sure we can sort something out here. I think you are right, my only option is to borrow the money, unfortunately with my meagre income I am unlikely to be able to borrow such a large sum of money from a reputable bank.
The only option would seem to be for me to approach a loan shark. Arthur Thomson lives near Bowmore and I could borrow Danny’s bicycle and go over to discus terms with Mr Thomson tonight. My concern is that Mr Thomson has a reputation as a ruthless thug, last year it was rumoured that he nailed old Mrs Flora McDonald to the door of her hovel after she was twice late with a payment.
May I be frank Mrs Mohd’s? I have great sympathy for your plight and would love to help you but in view of the unpleasant fate that would await me if I defaulted on a debt to Mr Thomson I have to be 100% certain that you will be able to reimburse me. It pains me to have to ask this, but I’m sure you will forgive me for doing so – Can I have your assurance, as one woman to another, that this isn’t a scam and I really will be reimbursed?
As soon as I receive your assurance then I will cycle to Bowmore and arrange the loan.

Kind Regards,
Ethel

Subject: RE: THE BOX IS DEPARTING THIS NIGHT
From: “Zahrah Mohd’s”
Date: Mon, December 1, 2014 4:10 pm

I understood from your mail and from the diplomatic agent in London that the custom is demanding clearance of the box of £2,265.00, although it is a normal procedure at the airport since the box is a waybill consignment and i also informed you about this charges before the box departed from Syria, please try as much possible to assist me for the clearance payment of the box in London airport, i have made a provision of 20% for you to get your money back as soon as the box arrived Scotland.
Please do not entertain fear about what you are spending on my behalf to retrieve the box from the custom in London airport since the money will be refunded in good agreement as discussed with out any hitch.
Contact the agent immediately to transfer the custom charges so that the box can be retrieved from the airport and delivered to you before the custom will demand for inspection of the box. You and i know very well that the content of the box is money, so you need to do whatever required to be done to ensure that the box leaves the airport in the next 48hrs.
Please do not entertain fears about the bill because as soon as the charges is paid today, the diplomatic agent Mr. Lord Porch will have access to claim the box and personal bring it to your address in Scotland without delay. Immediately the box arrived Scotland, please notify me so that i can forward the code number of the box for you to have access to deduct the money you spent including other money as we discussed in the previous mail. If you don’t have the complete money requested by the custom, you can get a loan since as soon as the box arrived Scotland you will have access to deduct the money in the box to refund where you borrowed immediately.
Thank you so kindly for your information.
I am looking forward to your swift responds in this aspect.

Mrs. Zahrah Mohd’s.

Dear Mrs Mohd’s

I have hit a slight problem with regard to your box. I had initially assumed that we could pay Lord Porch Cash on Delivery, i.e. pay him with some of the contents of your box once he had delivered it. Unfortunately it seems the sum of 2,265.00 pounds sterling needs to be paid before the box can be delivered.
As you will have gathered, I am not a rich woman and I have a sick husband to care for. I probably have in the region of 15, maybe 20 pounds in the house, I could probably ask my employers for an advance on next month’s salary, that might bring in another hundred or so. I’ll see if I can think up any money making schemes, but it would take something of a miracle for me to raise £2,265.00 today.
I’m more than happy to send all the money I can get hold of, but I can’t imagine that box will be released without full payment of the outstanding sum.
Do you have any suggestions Mrs Mohd’s?
Assuring you of my best intentions in this matter.
Kind Regards,
Ethel